One Disgusting Story

I was telling this story to my co-worker and she told me that I had to include this one on the blog.  So for everyone who feels like getting squeamish, please read on  If not, you may want to skip this one.  This is your warning.

As you know, I was in charge of doing all the chores this last weekend which included changing out all the fly and yellow jacket traps.  So I found a shovel and started to dig a hole in the dry hard earth.  This is not exactly an easy chore for me.  I dug and dug and barely broke ground.  So I grabbed the post digger and used that.  Meanwhile, Harley is watching me dig.

So, when I got about 8-10" hole, which is barely big enough, I grabbed the fly traps and emptied the contents into my hole.  So now this hole is full of mostly dead fly bodies, maggots, and few live ones.  I quickly buried them up and walked away to clean the traps and set them up again.

BIG MISTAKE

When I walked past my fly burial ground, I saw Harley, my doberman, digging them all up and the few live ones are flying everywhere.  SHIT!

I called him away and cursed myself for not putting him into the house.

I continued cleaning out the traps and setting new ones, when from the corner of my eye I see a white furry body rolling happily in the dirt.

There was Ellie, my sweet clean white Cavalier girl, rolling all over the dead fly bodies that Harley had just dug up.  I screamed at her to stop, but my screams were falling on deaf ears.  Once she was done, she happily pranced over to me all gray and black with dead fly parts and wings hanging off her.  UGH!

So I did what any good Cavalier Mother would do, I told my hubby to please give her a bath.

YUCK!

Chores

I know people have told me this, but Kevin and I have a lot of chores!  I have never felt it more than this weekend, when Kevin sprained his ankle.  I was left to get it all done by myself!  

So here is a list of typical chores we do on a weekend:

1. Wake Up.
2. Let out the goats.
3. Feed the dogs.
4. Give dogs their medications.
5. Feed the koi.
6. Take the dogs out to potty.
7. Clean up dog poop.
8. Make breakfast
9. Do the dishes.
10. Change out goat's water.  This is easier said than done, since it requires a screwdriver to remove it from the wall.  And then you have to carry the heavy bucket to a place to dump it.  Refill.  Do this twice!
11. Muck out the barn.  Also easier said than done. This requires pulling the green waste bin all the way down to the barn (we haven't set up the compost yet), scooping out the muck and then putting fresh bedding down.  Drag the bin all the way up the hill to where it belongs.
12. Change the water in the fish tank.
13. Clean filters in the koi pond and top off the water level.
14. Water the plants and the lawn.
15. Clean out the fly traps and the yellow jacket traps.
16. Clean up the house.  There is a LOT involved in this, but I won't go into detail.
17. Clean dog's drinking fountain.
18. Shower.
19. Eat.
20. Do the dishes.
21. Lock up the goats for the night.
22. Feed the dogs.
23. Take the dogs out to potty.
24. Sleep.

Let me tell you I am sore today!  But there is so much satisfaction at the end of the day when I am sitting on my deck enjoying the twilight with a glass a wine.  What a good life we have!

It is WAR!

That's IT Mr. Gopher!  You are no longer welcomed here.  I tried to let you live here, but you have not followed the rules.  You have continued to dig holes in the front lawn and that is just not acceptable!  You had 1 acre to choose from and you insisted on living on 200 SF that is my front lawn.  Not cool!

Here is your eviction notice: carbon monoxide.

Side note:  This first attempt to gas him failed. 

You may have won this battle, Mr. Gopher, but we will win the war!

Pop! Pop! Popcorn!

So recently I have been really into popcorn.  What a delicious, light, and healthy snack!  Well ... it has the possibility of being healthy.

I couldn't help myself and bought a box of "natural" microwave popcorn at the market.  When I brought it home I was disgusted with myself.  There is just SO much packaging and waste in a box of 3 popcorn bags. There is the card board box, the plastic around each bag, and then the bag itself.  And to top it off, who knows what chemicals are in the "natural" popcorn.  Just stuff you would have to be in a chemistry class to understand.  So when I finished the box  I made a resolve with myself to learn how to make popcorn over the stove.

Who would of thought it would be so easy?  Why is anyone making popcorn in the microwave?  Here is how I do it and now I can pronounce all the ingredients in my popcorn... corn, butter, salt.

1. 1/3 cup of popcorn kernels
2. 3 tablespoons of canola oil
3. Butter and salt (you decide how much)

Add the oil to your large saucepan and about 3 kernels and turn the stove on high.  
Wait for them to pop.  
Once they pop add the rest of the popcorn kernels and then remove the pan from the heat for 30 seconds.  Count out loud and insert the word, "Mississippi" in between your numbers.. makes it feel like you are 10 again.
Return the pan to the flame and wait for the rest of the kernels to pop.  They should start popping all at the same time.  Once it really gets going, give the pan a gentle shake and skew the lid a little.  It allows the steam to vent, so your popcorn is nice and crisp.  Once the popping stops, immediately pour into a bowl.  
Add butter and salt.

That's it!  Really!  Super easy and probably cheaper than the microwave stuff.  If you really want to go wild add some Parmesan cheese or Truffle oil.  Yum!

I can't get a picture of a bowl full of popcorn because someone insists on eating all of it right away

I wonder who that someone could be?

Let There Be Light

I know this is really weird, but Kevin and I have been sitting in the dark since we moved in.  How long has it been?  Oh, 10 weeks ago?  

Every room in the house has a ceiling fan with lighting except the living room.  Which happens to be the room we spend the most time in.  So, most logical people would run out and buy a lamp probably within 1-3 days of sitting in the dark.  Not me!  I straight up refused and made any guest who came over sit by the light of the TV or the light spilling over from the entry or the hallway. 

I know, strange, but there is a method to my madness (isn't there always?).  I wanted can lighting in that room, and not just any can lights, but cost efficient and eco LED lighting.  And if I go out and buy a lamp, I will never do it.  Recessed lighting would just end up at the bottom of my home improvement list, which if you haven't seen it, is very long.

So I called my friend Joe to help us with the lighting.  I showed him the room I needed lighting in, and showed him access into the attic, and then finally showed him the fuse box.  

Wait, wait, back up!  A fuse box?  Who still has those?  Well, I did.  And I kind of liked it, it was cute.  Joe, however, felt it had to go.  

So a trip to Home Depot was in order to buy the lighting, the cans, the wires, a new breaker box, light switches and dimmers.  I am not going to tell you how much that cost, but let's just say we'll be eating a lot of pasta.

On Joe's next visit, we did the installation and Kevin learned a thing or two about electrical construction.  I am so proud of him!

And now we have beautiful lighting!